FEELING THE PRESSURE? 3 Healthy Responses to Pressure I learned from Buying a New Car
Feeling the Pressure?
3 Healthy Responses to Pressure I learned from Buying a New Car
I wanted a Tesla. Sara wanted a reliable SUV that could tow a small camper.
Our primary need was a car for Sara to drive 5 miles a day.
We bought a Subaru Outback. Sara won. HA!
I will admit Sara was right, and I am just a kid wanting a new fun toy.
Our 2008 Silverado bit the dust four weeks ago, and we have been in the market for a new-to-us vehicle.
Shopping for a new car might be one of my least favorite activities. Many have contacted me, saying that car buying is the worst. I am usually happy with my car purchases, but I wouldn't mind missing out on the emotional rollercoaster experience of buying a car.
Sara created an extensive list of potential cars on a spreadsheet, and I updated the budget to reflect four different purchase scenarios: a $15,000 car, a $20,000 car, a $25,000 car, and a Tesla. Each plan's pros and cons list is long and exhaustive, yet we sat there four weeks into this journey, feeling no more prepared to purchase a car than the day the truck died. Why?
In December of 2022, we heard God ask us to grant Him space to prepare our minds for His will by fasting from spending money in January 2023. My will says buy a Tesla or some other fun vehicle. His will says to depend on God always.
Little did we know that God was preparing us for our immediate future by not spending the money He knew we would need in a few weeks.
Sara and I hate having debt, so the thought of taking on debt to have a fantastic car was paralyzing. The point of this blog is not to say debt is terrible and run from it, although that is decent advice. The point of this blog is to share what I learned about how to respond to pressure through the car-buying process.
Last week I wrote, "If I don't like what I'm getting, I need to change what I'm giving!"
Well, now that sentiment speaks even louder. What will I give my resources most to; my selfish desires or to better our future? Thankfully we chose the second option.
Here are three healthy responses to pressure we learned while buying a car we hipe help you make better decisions when you are under immense pressure (no matter the cause):
May your prayers outnumber your thoughts and worries
Could we sometimes fail to receive God's best for us because we remain passive when He calls us to obey His will? Have we oversimplified our theology of prayer to the point where we never listen for direction from the Lord? I have always struggled with thinking and not praying. Our most significant issue with prayer is NOT unanswered prayers, but the prayer requests we NEVER gave over to God. Our first problem is all the prayers we've NEVER prayed. Sara and I often discussed this over our four-week car-buying journey: are we praying more than we are researching?
Ask yourself: Do I complain more about those who frustrate me, or do I pray more for those who frustrate me?
Does God still perform miracles? He is still a miracle healer and active in your everyday life. However, we place conditions on our desired blessings. Another way to say it is: most often, we miss the miracle because it wasn't the one we specifically requested. When we pray with a condition, we prevent ourselves from seeing the million little ways God shows up in our daily lives, leaving us asking, "Why didn't God show up?" God's miracle for Sara and me in our car-buying experience was His presence with us the entire time. Thankfully we didn't take it for granted.
Ask yourself: What miracle are you praying for God to grant you?
Be patient - respond to the situation and don't react to the problem.
The enemy's goal is to distract you and lead you to endless depression and discontentment, so you can't see God's good, pleasing, and perfect will for you. Reconstruct your faith: Receive God's goodness for you amid your pain, not proven by the absence of your pain. We want the pain gone immediately. I get it; why wouldn't we want it gone? If we rush through the decision-making process - it doesn't matter what is pressuring us - we are at a greater risk of making a decision we will later regret. I recommend doing some "mindfulness" exercises and breathing deeply four times before deciding how to respond to pressure.
Ask yourself: Am I exhausting all my energy on "battles" I don't need to fight? Am I more concerned with eliminating the pressure or finding a wise solution to the "said" problem or pressure?
Remain others focused
Every day these last four weeks, I asked Sara, "Why can't I let go of the idea of buying a Tesla, something I know we don't need?" Our challenge today is the secularization of our culture. It draws us to live life apart from God and to see life not as an expression of worship but as a means to gratify ourselves in the materialism and hedonism of our culture. An often ignored consequence of living to satisfy yourself/me is the ongoing developing theology of self, the belief in one's mind, thoughts, and emotions. Pursuing self is NOT the highest good and destiny of one's life. The pursuit of God is the highest good of your life. Eventually, and not quickly enough, I realized I wanted a Tesla because I wanted something for myself and was ignoring Sara's needs. About two weeks into this journey, we asked each other, "What do you want, and what are your 'absolutes' with this next car." Funny enough, our extremely long list of potential cars shrunk to about five in a few minutes. It is incredible how quickly things changed when we (or at least I) became focused on the wants and needs of the other person.
Ask yourself: Do my wants or needs benefit most from this decision?
What would you add to this list?